The night I almost died...

Have you ever smelled something that really wasn't there? 
It's called a phantom smell and it's usually bad news.... As was tonight. I was watching Twilight Eclipse when I began to smell the distinct scent of bacon. I love bacon and always welcome such aroma. But the fact that I wasn't cooking bacon, or anything for that matter, caused great concern. So great that I actually paused the movie during the tent scene.... ya, I know! I walked over to the kitchen, and found nothing... stepped into the pantry, nada. I sat back on the couch to continue my movie when it hit me again. Bacon. But where was it coming from? I had heard of phantom smells before and their relation to brain tumors.... so I Googled it and there it was, all of it. Phantom smells, brain tumors, stroke, epilepsy, dementia, Alzheimer's.... And it was perfectly clear I had each one of them. I felt myself starting to sweat a little as I read through each of my ailments. Should I write Jared a letter in case I don't make it before he gets home? Should I call my mom one last time? Instead I decided to use the restroom. As I walked down the hallway the scent grew strong. My time has come, I thought. Once I had reached the bathroom tho, the smell was so strong I could actually taste it. Wait a minute.... it seemed to be coming from the front door. I followed the smell... followed it out of the apartment and right up to my neighbors. They were cooking bacon! I had found the source, figured out the mystery and more importantly ended the idea of my impending doom.............. for now.